Go West (1925) is a Buster Keaton film, directed and written by him. It's just as adorable as everything else he's starred in. Here is my review of it.
Courtesy of cowboysindians.com
Go West from 1925 stars Buster Keaton. It is the story of a man trying to make it out west. He jumps onto some railroad cars, wanders onto a ranch, and proceeds to not know anything about ranching (he still gets hired somehow). He creates a friendship with this heifer (female cow) as he hilariously bumbles many of his tasks, somehow getting a few of them done.
The main conflict of the story is simply the rancher having one chance to make it - and he'll only make it when the cows reach the slaughterhouse. When the time comes, he insists on taking the heifer. He doesn't give it to Keaton's character to spare her. Keaton hides on the train to free her when the train gets there. The train is held up. After a gunfight he manages to get on the train that is freely going down the track on its own. He stops the train at the station and, through many antics and silly moments, gets the herd to the stockyard. The rancher then lets him have the heifer and they drive back to the ranch.
My Review
This film is adorable. You have an adorable heifer following Keaton around everywhere, the silly antics of Keaton, and enough of a plot to have some stakes. It could be summed up as a man's friendship with a heifer. The main character bumbled his way into saving the day. Being from farm country makes this even funnier. Keaton's character doesn't know how to milk a cow, doesn't understand branding and why it's done, leaves gates wide open, doesn't know how to herd cattle, and is probably the worst hand there. And yet he's allowed to remain.
We have a woman involved here, but she doesn't have much to do with the plot. Keaton's character focuses his attention on the heifer he's befriended. They make a joke of this at the end. The rancher offers anything to Keaton and his response is "I want her" (pointing behind him, where the rancher's daughter stands), then clarifies by walking past the daughter to pull the heifer out from behind the fence by a halter and rope. The farmer laughs and allows him to keep the heifer.
I liked it and found it adorable. I give it 10 out of 10 stars. Anything by Keaton is worth watching. This wasn't actually my favorite one, but it was good. Be aware some YouTube recordings can have sound coming and going (background music - even silents aren't fully silent). I had to go between two recordings to get all the background music.
Courtesy of IMDB.com - Buster Keaton trying to milk a cow by looking at it.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
No, we are not talking about clowns. We are talking about a silent film from 1927. Starring Clara Bow, it is all about the idea you have "it" or you don't. "It" is essentially sex appeal that gets you what you want. Here's what I thought of it.
Courtesy of TCM
I both do and don't like the main characters. Clara Bow is an actress beloved to silent film. She can cry on a dime (sadly, because she had a terrible childhood). This is the romance between Betty (Clara Bow) and Mr. Waltham - who had a girlfriend this entire time and ignored her like she was chopped liver. It starts with Betty working at Waltham's Store, where she sees the new boss (Mr. Waltham) and falls in love instantly. This whole time Monty (Waltham's friend) is reading an article about "It" - sex appeal that guarantees you get your man/woman.
Courtesy of Pinterest- Clara Bow
Betty comes home to her roommate (who has a child). Poverty stricken as her friend is, things look kind of desperate for her friend. She goes to the Ritz after being asked out by Monty, purely to sit at a table near Mr. Waltham - who is with his girlfriend and her mother. This is after she created a dress from her work dress (because her work dress isn't good enough for the Ritz). At any rate, she gets herself noticed by Waltham, who then conveniently forgets his girlfriend exists several times when talking to her.
When he sees her at work, she collects on her bet that he wouldn't recognize her next time he sees her. To compete with the girlfriend (this I don't like at all) she says "take me out to the beach for dinner" and he literally ignores the fact his girlfriend had asked and he said yes to that. In other words, he brushed off his girlfriend to go out with Betty. I don't like that Betty did this or that our main man treats his girlfriend like she's nothing important. I hate it, actually, but let's move on.
She comes home and welfare is trying to take her friend's child. She has no means of support and these two older women want to take the baby from her. Betty races up the stairs, takes the baby in her arms, and claims she has a job and it's hers to save her friend. This I do like. She even tells the welfare women that "if women like them had babies instead of doing this they'd be better off". She tells them off and then some. This gets back to Waltham through Monty, though, and he thinks badly of her because he thinks the baby is hers. I don't like our main man. She literally should have taken Monty and been done with it.
Betty gets to work and he's suddenly cold to her. She quits her job. Betty then gets a visit from Monty, who then realizes his mistake - in actually thinking she had a child. They then concoct a plan to get back at Waltham for not giving her the benefit of the doubt. Monty gets her into the yacht for the week long party and she manipulates Waltham into proposing, only to laugh him off, then cry because it wasn't funny after all. No kidding, Betty, no kidding. This I don't like her for. Monty spills that it wasn't her child and then the two get together (despite a girlfriend who's literally treated like she's wallpaper) after Monty steers a boat into another boat. The two women fall off the boat. Waltham, once again the boyfriend of the year, gives his girlfriend a life preserver and swims to Betty. At the end Monty and the girlfriend watch them flirt while standing on the anchor attached to the boat.
My Thoughts
It must be said that I appreciate Betty defending her friend from Welfare workers. It also must be said that I don't endorse manipulation and think our main man is a dirtbag. He treats his long-term girlfriend like she's wallpaper and doesn't exist. He says he'll dine with her, then goes to the beach with Betty. We see no apology and the girlfriend looks like she's miserable. I don't think it takes a detective to find out why. These characters are not nice people.
Courtesy of Alamy - Clara Bow
The point of the film and the idea of "it" is you can get exactly what you want with sex appeal - as long as you have "it". You have it or you don't. It means you effortlessly get what you want by being yourself. Or using your sex appeal to get it. "It" in this scenario is charm and charisma, and being attractive to others. Long story short, Betty had "it" and got the man she wanted. I feel so bad for the girlfriend. And Monty. Seriously, if you don't like your girlfriend you should break up. Don't just go all in on a side chick who has no shame in being a side chick.
My rating
To say I didn't enjoy myself would be a lie. I did enjoy myself. I would give a it a 7 out of 10, just because the main man and the main woman were not the type I'd root for. I'd argue that both are equally making bad choices. One is throwing away a relationship of many years and not just breaking up, and the other is homewrecking.
The good part of the rating comes from great music, great acting, excellent dialogue, and an engaging film. I was never bored. Clara Bow had an amazing performance with emotion and drama, as well as those tears she could conjure in seconds. Well worth watching. You should see what you think.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
I picked up an ebook of Alice In Wonderland. It included Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Through The Looking Glass, and The Hunting of The Snark. I'll review them individually. It's been a fun ride. I don't regret spending money on this.
Courtesy of Pinterest.co.uk
Below I have reviewed my ebook copy of Alice In Wonderland, which includes Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Through The Looking Glass, and The Hunting of The Snark. I'll review them one at a time for you. These were all read in the span of half a day. Maybe five hours and these were reviewed. It won't take long to pick these up.
Alice's Adventures In Wonderland
You start with a bored little girl, drop into a silly, absurd storyline, and come back to a little girl who's fallen asleep on the grass. My description of witty puns, funny conversations, odd images, and genuinely weird situations won't do it justice. Read it yourself. It isn't something you can easily describe, nor does it make sense. Given that it ends up being a child's dream, that makes sense. If you read it, you know how absurd it gets. It doesn't become disturbing, though, so your child can easily read it, with some help for younger children.
Courtesy of Pinterest
I give this four stars. From the puns to the silly characters, to the absurdity of the entire story, I love it. It made me laugh. The book was a joyous experience paired with "Have I eaten drugged food lately?". We have hedgehogs and flamingoes as croquet balls and mallets (understandably trying to flee) , Alice conversing with a bunch of birds, a tea party with people who angered Time and paid the price, and a court with no order whatsoever. You step into a world of odd creatures and the imagination of a child. Read it sometime. You'll all love it.
Through The Looking Glass
This story was slightly less whimsical but just as ridiculous. You have some overlapping character profiles in it, too. It is clearly a different story, though. Alice is 7 and 6 months. She's seeing nursery ryhmes come to life in the dream she's having. Once again, she has drifted off to sleep, and this time she's woken by her cats, whom she started the story talking to. She walks into the mirror, goes into a world where everything is done and read backwards, and follows a chess board pattern of squares to become queen. It is disjointed because it is a dream. She blends from location to location as the story goes. It's slightly more coherent than when she was younger, but not by much.
Courtesy of alice-in-wonderland.net
I give this one five stars. I can see where Tim Burton got some of his ideas about the Hatter from this. I can also see where he got Alice going through a mirror. It is the first whimsical thing in the story. I love that she's talking to kittens. It brings me joy to see her interact with them. You can see what she's remembering as you see events unfold. The hilarious thing about this one is when everyone she meets insists on reciting poetry or singing her the song of their people - none of which make any sense at all. This one was slightly easier to follow, but not really. Reading the first story primed me for this one. Still, Alice is older, so she's not as imaginative as younger Alice. You get the sense she's growing up.
The Hunting of The Snark
This is poetry, not a short story, but it tells the story of a bunch of silly sailors hunting a snark. It's ridiculous and adorable at the same time. If you liked the silly poetry in the Alice stories, you'll like this. I imagine a snark is just an imaginary creature. Or not. The poetry is clear as mud on that. The snark is not really the point - the people are the point. They find it. It kills one of them because it was a Boojum. Makes no sense. It wasn't really supposed to, I think. It was just a fun ride.
Courtesy of Alamy
Five stars to the poetry that made me giggle over one line: "They charmed it with smiles and soap". I would read more of his poetry any day of the week. It was clever. It referenced the Bandersnatch and Jubjub bird. It made me smile. There was also a beaver making lace. Who doesn't like a beaver making lace?
Ending Thoughts
When reading this stuff, don't expect much to make sense. Poetry galore fills the pages and Alice just rolls with the weird, obtuse, absurd world she's fallen asleep into. You can tell she grew up in the second one. The bonus poetry is worth checking out. My ebook included it with the Alice stories. My version came from Kobo and I'd suggest getting the version with this poetry included. I even got personal letters from Lewis Caroll in between. It was one dollar and six cents on Kobo.
A note, there is one lost chapter that has been found for Through The Looking Glass and you can find the original shorter manuscript Alice's Adventures Underground (the pre-published Alice's Adventures in Wonderland). You'll find the whole package of that in Kobo, too, as well as some that have the children's condensed version for younger kids (Alice Nursery). Whatever you want to read of all that, you can find on Kobo and probably anywhere else. I didn't need all of it. You can feel free to indulge yourself because it is less than five dollars on Kobo to get all of it.
Also, it's short. I read it in half a day and I wasn't even home all day. You can easily swing this if you're an avid reader or you have time to kill before the kids get home. You could read this to your kids. It's nonsense poetry and silly characters. I call it safe to read at an age. The only caution is big words. That's why Alice Nursery exists.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
Face Pareidolia is not a phrase most people utter, but yet it happens daily to most of us. What is it? It is the ability of the brain to see faces in everyday objects. Let's dig into the concept.
Courtesy of happybirthdayall.com
Have you ever stared at your bathroom floor and seen what you think looks like a face or an outline of a dog, or an outline of an object? I have. I continue to see various shapes in my bathroom floor linoleum pattern, as well as several faces of different types in the wood grains of doors. This is a real thing.
I do know that it's just my brain making sense of the world and that it's not really a face. I understand such things. You have no reason to question my sanity in this scenario if you were concerned by the previous paragraph. The human brain is finding patterns where there are not patterns. That's the real reason you see a face pattern in a light switch or bathroom linoleum.
Why our brain does this
Many reasons for this exist, including looking for predators and the social instincts of humans. Imagine you are trying to hide from a tiger. If you see its face first you'll live longer. That's the idea behind seeing faces in other things. When anxiety levels are higher you see even more faces. We need to know friend from foe, so it is much safer to mistake something that isn't a face for a face than the other way around. You'd get killed by that tiger, otherwise.
Courtesy of Rd.com
Your eyes send a signal to the brain, which then translates what you see. Seeing what looks like two eyes, a nose, and a mouth will come back as a face. Another consideration is what you expect to see. If you were told a face was in the image, you'll see a face most of the time - even in static. An experiment was done that proved this. You'll see it in the first source link. "Jesus in toast" is the name of the study.
What we know as a friend is shaped by early face shapes in life. We see familiar face shapes and features as safe. This is what we take into account without even realizing we do it. It's a survival instinct. Combatting racism, for instance, can be done in early development by showing an infant all races of people in the first nine months of life.
The brain assigning meaning to the world around us happens every minute of our lives. We do it automatically. It makes sense that we'd see shapes and faces in wood grains, flooring, outlet covers, rock formations, and other surfaces. Confirmation bias influences what we see. Not everyone sees the same shape in the clouds or the shape of a mustache in the flooring.
Other types
Motion pareidolia is a real thing, too. Did you see motion? Was it really there? Maybe you didn't really see it. Your brain can be wrong. If you are already keyed up and freaked out, you'll think something moved. This is why you don't watch horror films or creepy videos alone.
Sometimes this can feed right into superstitions. Superstitious people who see what they expect to see can take it as a "sign" and be wrong. There are times that something is a sign, but there are also pareidolia moments full of confirmation bias. Double-check your "signs" with people you trust. You might be off a little. Or not. It's never a bad idea to ask those you trust for wisdom.
Courtesy of justsomething.co
You also give emotion and personality to faces. Think of emojis. This is how emojis actually work and provide meaning. You can see a sinister face in wood grain or a friendly laughing face in a pot hole, or a shocked face in an outlet.
Another thing to take into account is how much you see faces in stuff. High anxiety causes this to happen more. Schizophrenia causes this to a very high degree. No, you are not crazy if you see faces in wood grain and other pictures. All of us see it, but many who have disorders related to Schizophrenia see it so much more than others.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
I had a fabulous time reading four books. Let me tell you all about them. On this week's TBR we have With A Mind To Kill, Role of Honor, Only To Sleep, and The Rising Sea. All of which come from a series of books. I'll get into what series in my four sections of reviews. Let's dive in.
I read four books in a week. Upon finishing them, I can recommend all of them. Below I'll outline exactly why I loved the book and who would most love it. Let's get to the reviews.
With A Mind To Kill by Anthony Horowitz
The premise of this book requires you to have some knowledge of previous books (Ian Fleming books), but he does explain in the first two page what you need to know. It is set two weeks after Scaramanga was killed in Jamaica. Before the events of Scaramanga in Jamaica, James Bond had attempted to kill M because KGB brainwashed him while he wandered with Amnesia. This plot sends Bond back to the people who brainwashed him in order to get more information (after he's been recovered and fully himself again). He's replacing an informant who was found out and was hammered to death. I'll stop there and let you read it yourself.
Courtesy of Amazon.co.uk
It picks up the style of Ian Fleming, with less sexism. The ending is not to be spoiled. This is the third Bond novel Horowitz has written. I give it five stars. I want this one to be made into a movie. I would watch it in film form in a heartbeat. Please, make this one into a film! It'd be worth the money.
The main reason I loved it was the high stakes. It had high stakes all through it, due to the mission only being known about by M and M's Chief of Staff. Bond has to pretend to be brainwashed this whole time and make it look good. He nearly slips up at one point. His own service (minus M and Bill Tanner) don't know he isn't brainwashed anymore. This means he's almost on his own. The High Stakes of the mission leave you on the edge of your seat. He's practically solo and could have been found out at any time.
If you love James Bond films and books, you'll love this one. If you like high stakes, top secret missions, cold war espionage, and spy thrillers you'll want to the pick this one up. I'd also get acquainted with the Ian Fleming Bond if I were you. You'll see lots of references to those (though you don't need to know all of them to understand the plot).
Role of Honor by John Gardner
Another bond book, this one by Gardner, who picked up the series after Ian Fleming died. Several authors have done the same. Bond could live in fiction as long as Scooby Doo, which is to say as long was people will read him. And they do. Author aside, this one has a similar concept to the first but a different plot. Bond is on a mission for M and Bill Tanner that eventually involves Spectre. It takes place in the 1980s. We hear all about computers and war gaming (which sounds like risk and some of the war games I see ads for). The basic gist of it is that Bond has to pretend to leave the service and be for hire. He came into money after an uncle died and M saw that as an opportunity to break into a group, a group that uses it's tech simulations to train criminals (so, think some plotlines of Grand Theft Auto, only its really a tutorial for a real heist).
Courtesy of Kobo
I give this one five stars, too. The stakes are also high. Again, only M and Bill Tanner know he's not leaving the service. Again, he has to look bad and play the role of a man for hire. He has the challenge of getting word out to M of what is going on, but still not being found out. He has to use other agents he encounters to help him. His telephone in his car is eventually disabled by Spectre and the main villain, giving him no or limited ways to contact M. He was forced to get creative in order to get to his car phone before it got disabled. It ended badly for the lookout, but he did get there.
I'd recommend this to any Bond fan. Gardner has several books, all of them excellent. I'd go in order, maybe start with Fleming's work and go into Gardner's collection. This one doesn't require you to have any previous knowledge of Bond history, with the exception of knowing what Spectre is. Even that can be figured out by context. You won't be confused by anything if you don't know what Spectre is. Gardner makes it clear it's a rival organization, which is really all you need to know.
Only To Sleep by Lawrence Osborne
Any fans of the Philip Marlowe series (by Raymond Chandler) will be thrilled to find out that many have continued the Marlowe series in standalone. I loved this one. I collect both this series and the James Bond series. The main plot of this one starts off with a retired Marlowe, who comes out of retirement to look into a sketchy life insurance case. A man died in Mexican waters and the life insurance company is in doubt about the whole thing. They think they were scammed. Marlowe bribes some locals in the area to find out that the man found dead wasn't the man named by the police. His ID didn't match his face and the man who "died" and gave his widow money was very much alive. He spends the rest of the book chasing the man and the "widow".
Courtesy of audible.co.uk
I give this one five stars. I loved it for many reasons, one of which being Marlowe's wit. It had the same feel as the Chandler books. The more Marlowe did on the case, the more the old wit came back. The sarcasm of Marlowe is one reason I love the series.
If you like sarcastic private investigators whose cases start simple and get complicated, you'll love anything Philip Marlowe. If you love the trope of the investigator being told to go home and walk away, and they don't, you'll love Marlowe. I'd suggest reading the original Raymond Chandler Marlowe before reading this, just to get the feel for what your main character is like. Retired Marlowe had lost some of his spark at the beginning of the book and had regained that spark as he finished the case.
The Rising Sea by Clive Cussler and Graham Brown
The NUMA files are a series I also collect, all of them great and exciting adventures. The plot centers on NUMA, the National Underwater and Marine Agency, investigating the reason the seas are rising rapidly. The plot also ties in the history of two swords and the legend that went with them. The Chinese are mining with robots and making them more and more human this whole book. Like every NUMA files book I've ever read, the prologue ties into the plot perfectly, intersecting with the economic disaster NUMA is trying to prevent. Our main characters Kurt Austin and Joe Zavala are amazing, as usual. It's easier to read the book to understand how all this comes together. I won't spoil it for you.
Courtesy of audible.ca
This is another five star read. The reason I loved it so much has a lot to do with loving the characters. You care about them and their adventure. Their banter is funny, the excitement doesn't end, and the end is satisfying. Everything ties neatly into a bow, creating a satisfying ending.
If you like tidy endings, economic disasters, fantastical plots, political intrigue, fight sequences, and general adventure and antics you'll love this. It has some spy plot aspects to it. It's not a spy novel, but behaves like one at times. Lovable heroes make the whole thing fun to read.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
I did men writing women. It is only fair I do women writing men. Strap in and let's go.
Courtesy of Pinterest
Men have been written wrong, too. Today we explore that and hear what the men think about some women writing male characters. Not much else to say here, so we're jumping right in.
Physical Attributes
Height has its' drawbacks. Do we put that in our writing? Sometimes not. Maybe we don't think about it. If someone is 6'5" they don't fit in beds. They might hit their head off low ceilings or be uncomfortable in tiny cars. You can fix this by having them hit their head on a low ceiling in a cave or complain about being in a tiny car. Maybe they have a custom bed or they hate the bed in the tavern or hotel. Be realistic with tall people in general. Apparently, it is common to have tall men in books, but not address the awkwardness of leaning down to hug short people or hit their heads on doorframes. Be aware of your character's height and you'll easily fix the issue.
The common 6'2" man with abs, a deep voice, and olive skin is out there. It's a fantasy. It'll probably be in most romances you've seen. An author might add something about his jawline or eyes here, too. Men fantasize women and women fantasize men. We're both guilty of this. Add to these traits that he's rich and does everything right, somehow knowing exactly what the woman wants. That's not realistic. This can happen in all genres, but romances are more likely to be doing this type of thing. Try to not create your perfect man on paper in your writing, unless of course your character is doing that in her head and that is the intention. Then it is okay.
Courtesy of Pinterest
Learn anatomy. Women and men need to know their own and the other's anatomy, no matter what sixth-grade me thought when I blew off studying it. Maybe you can't label all the parts, but at least know what men and women do during sex if you insist on writing it. You'll need it if you yourself do anything sexual. I suggest not writing sex unless it is necessary to the plot (like the book Grace In Thine Eyes) and you've actually had sex.
The guys with six-packs for days should be seen in gyms. They should be going to the gym. If they have abs and don't go anywhere near a gym it doesn't make sense. How did they get and maintain those abs the whole book? Think about that if you want the character to be built like an athlete. An athlete works for their abs and their muscles. The character should do the same.
Brooding and tall (a description) are not personality traits that should be their whole personality. We need a real personality put into male characters. YA fiction likes the tall brooding men. Controlling can also be added as a personality. Please don't. It isn't a good example to the young emotionally charged women. Let's put healthy men into the storyline, or at least a story arc where they change for the better in a realistic way (by growing up).
Personality
Men's roles in women's writing go into several categories according to men. These include rescuers who aren't vulnerable, swearing never to fall in love because parents divorced, and his ex cheated on him. According to what men in real life think, these characters never think "life happens" and you don't have to swear off love and sleep with random women out of anger.
Romance is a fantasized genre. It can absolutely be emotional junk food. One role fictional men have is being the CEO of a company, who then has an interest in a woman. So far this isn't the whole problem. The problem is they suddenly have all the time in the world for just that woman. This is clearly fantasizing. It isn't what real men do. If you want to write real men, don't do this.
Sometimes bad writing of a character is bad writing. Men can do this with women, too. Men driven by lust, anger, or duty is a common trope. Men with no agency is bad character writing. Anyone in your storyline with no agency is not a well-written character. Bosses sometimes have a goal and it's never established why. That is also bad writing. Ask why while writing a backstory to avoid this mistake. Everyone should have agency.
Anger in men is so common you can point to it in several novels. Anger is an emotion every character has; that isn't the issue. The issue is when men only show anger and lash out at bad news. It's bad in real life, too. The thing is, though, that men are taught it isn't cool to show emotion. They'll usually just internalize it and mask it instead. It has to be the last straw to lash out in anger, or they need to have a hot temper. Watch real men show real emotion before writing it in your novel.
The idiot husband/boyfriend is not okay. You see it in sitcoms all the time. Men are tired of it. Men don't need to be Sherlock all the time, but they aren't stupid. Please write someone with intelligence. If someone is supposed to be slow on purpose that's different; it simply shouldn't be a pointlessly gendered trait.
Every character has flaws, or should. Unless you are writing a fantasizing sequence on purpose, showcase the flaws of the man with as much depth as the woman's flaws. No perfect human is currently on this earth (not counting Jesus). Let's embrace that and let the men have their emotional depth. I actually think Lonesome Dove is a good series to read for this one. It was written by a man, but women can certainly learn from it. Woodrow Call's emotional issues are explored in ways you wouldn't expect. Oh, and men can cry. Let them!
I can change him. This is a sentence that needs to die in a hole, in real life and fiction. No, you can't, ladies. He's his own person. This trope should leave and never come back. Fiction using this trope isn't healthy. Stop. We're teaching the younger women they can fix abusive individuals. They can't. Don't encourage it.
Real Life Men
You know those long-winded conversations about girls that show up in movies? Throw it all away. It doesn't happen. How they feel is determined by how they act when everyone is together. A long conversation about feelings isn't the typical male response. Society has not encouraged that in men. I don't even know if gay men would do this. I won't say they do, lest I be wrong. Comment if you have an opinion here. I'd love to hear it.
Men smirking is not a trope that works. It is so common but so wrong. Most of the time they'll have a neutral face, maybe even blank. Edward Cullen and other characters like him are a fantasy someone created. Keep that in mind. Any romance lead can be a fantasy and reflect what they want (whether it is disturbing or not).
Courtesy of Pinterest
Inner monologue is not the same in men and women, according to other men. Someone can tell if a woman wrote a man because the man's inner voice is too analytical. Women look at many different angles while men are quick and concise. An example given is about a table leg. Most men will jump straight to the solution and grab the hammer and nails, even if they don't quite know how to fix it. Men and introspection are not incompatible. Make it come in short bursts. Also, they want to fix it rather than discuss it (most of the time), but it depends on the man.
Men are driven by sight. The "men are more visual" that comes from the women who judge the shorts at summer camp are not wrong (even if some of them do go overboard on modesty-policing). I did a whole blog on men and visual minds (link to the blog is here) that might help you get into a male viewpoint. You are seeing more in a male perspective. Some men can also turn images in their heads (my husband) and visualize what they want in a creative project. My husband can pack the car and dishwasher better than I can. I let him do it because if I put something in the car he'll rearrange it to pack more in.
Thinking about nothing is possible. My husband has described his nothing space to me. He says it's relaxing. I don't have a nothing space. I can't imagine having a nothing box. It'd drive me crazy. Men sitting in their nothing box need that downtime. Women writing men don't take this into account. You can sit and coexist with your friends mindlessly. It has no deeper meaning. Nothing means exactly that.
Men in society horse around with each other verbally and physically. Sometimes women don't know where that line actually sits. Some groups are established with hierarchy and rigid dominance-based behavior, but this isn't accurate. Knowing where that line between hurtful and playful joking is will go a long way toward creating real men on a page. Catty and passive-aggressive dominance is hard to believe, unless the men in your story buy into the "alpha male" stuff (please don't buy into it).
Introspective thoughts for (most) men don't usually veer toward feelings of others and motives. According to what I found, it sounds more like making elaborate future plans, replaying a cringy moment, or weird and unlikely hypothetical situations. I don't think this a gender problem, though. You see, I do this too and I'm a woman. I think it depends on personality type and gender combined. Some personalities (men and women) are super feelers who feel everything, so this isn't every man represented in this statement. Talk to real men and see what you can find out for yourself. That's my advice.
Emotion is something men are taught to hold in, thus we see men giving other men space. Most don't want to overstep the emotion boundary. It's likely they'll only do so if the other shares first. They know the emotions are hidden for a reason. It's kind of a standoff within conversation. No one yields and no emotion is revealed. Fear of showing weakness also prevents openly struggling. For this reason, they can be made to look like barbarians or "turn the other cheek" too much. This isn't accurate.
Locker room talk? It doesn't exist in mature men. It's either a teen trying to look cool by saying "I had sex with (name)" and that's it, or a complete weirdo. No one wants to hear about it. Maybe past men did this. Right now in this era, they don't. Sex in detail isn't the priority when you are just getting ready or showering after a sport. The same goes for barber shop talk. It's mostly sports.
Women who write men reacting to every little thing are projecting their experiences onto male characters. Really, men don't do that. They refreshingly say what they think to your face. It's so nice to see it. They say what they think about you. They don't backstab (most of the time). While there are a few who do backstab, most just tell you straight. After a fight, no one makes all that big a deal over it. It was entertainment. Or the whole situation was disarmed by a crude joke.
Some men don't know as much about their friend group as we women think. They might not know the name of someone else's girlfriend (of 2 years). Men in my experience tend to do stuff. While they do converse on hobbies and about life in general, this makes sense. When you do more than talk you'll focus on that one topic. They'll fish for hours and talk for only one hour of the four-hour trip. How close men are can be sensed by how "mean" they are to their face and how well they speak of someone when they are not present.
When someone a man's into asks a question, they don't suddenly become vulnerable types. According to one of my sources (Yahoo life) one of two things can happen. They acknowledge it jokingly or dance around their emotions if it is a heavier topic. Straight answers don't just come out. To get that type of answer in an emotional topic they need to be vulnerable before that.
Do men think about sex? Yes. Do they think about their penis every minute? No. Get a balance. Talk to a real man and get an idea of what their thoughts are like from there. Make it someone who won't brush you off, like a husband or boyfriend. Men are connected with physical touch and women connected with emotion. Keep that in mind for your perspectives.
Men have conversations on "do penguins have knees" topics. Do vacuums suck because they suck or suck because they don't suck? How strong are gorillas? Could I pick up Thor's hammer and be worthy? Men can discuss that at length. Men can be late to a date because they decided to debate a comic book topic or talk about the insane film theory of Mort (Madagascar). Put this in your next romance novel. It happens all the time.
Details? No. Big picture? Yes. They won't know the brand of shoe their date wore or the brand of dress. The take in bigger picture and not the tiny details of the scene. The exception to this is when they have a hobby they deeply care about. Basketball stats, book plots. videogames, electronics, train setups, woodworking, and other examples like it are all in-depth hobbies. My husband can go on and on about 3D printing and electronics projects (none of which make sense to me, but I'm happy because he is). My brother in law knows exactly the models he needs for his next project. Unless they are deeply interested, don't go into details in your male POV descriptions. Good character work in general will have a character of any gender paying attention to what is important in their eyes. Maybe your character (gender aside) will ignore some of the room because nothing else interests them.
The Best Advice
If I had to give advice on how to write men, talk to one or two. Talk to a dozen men about what is and isn't accurate in fiction. Glean the knowledge and run with it. Observe the men in your life, take notes, and roll with what you observe. Write fleshed out, real people. Gender be darned, just write people.
One of two extremes tends to happen (source:Jeune authors). Either you wrote a woman in a man's body or you hit the nail on the head. Usually it doesn't hit middle ground. Below are common mistakes women have made writing men.
Protective instincts are not thought about. They are subconscious. Rarely does someone think "I must protect her/him". Men just do. They rush in on instinct. Thoughts? Who has time for that? No one. Not one person. Write how he takes action, not what his thoughts are.
Selfless heroes should at least notice what they get out of a situation. Real people aren't saints. Only Jesus was perfect. Make them think like real people. Make him selfish to some degree, even if he acts selfless. This goes for every character you ever write, but I'm saying it; what is their motive? Not everyone is Captain America. Some men act on the motivation "it's the right thing to do" but correctly timing that motivation is a problem. Know your character flaws and agendas. Write someone with a motive to do the right thing, while acknowledging they have "what's in it for me?" thoughts alongside their good act.
Sometimes we write men who are too sensitive. One way to fix this is by adding arrogance. It isn't hard to do. We see this in both genders all the time. Men can be sensitive, yet the sensitive man is hard to write correctly. It can wander into wimp/sissy territory according to Jeune Authors. Men tend to hide emotions more than express them. If they say something, it's serious. Make a sensitive character at least put on a mask of confidence and arrogance, even if it isn't truly how they feel inside. Guys like to feel in control. Yes, exceptions exist, but you'll see this more often.
Sensitivity in men is a big topic. Men don't focus on feelings, in fact, some (not all) are kind of clueless. They think about what others are planning and thinking, but feelings are not the top of the list. General rule of thumb, women are interested in people and men in things. Based on this rule, men look at how things work. In my husband's words (and he's a great, loving, attentive husband) emotion gets in the way of decisions. You can make men trying to be sensitive a little awkward (depending on your character and personality type). Maybe he'll misinterpret how a girl feels about him.
When writing sensitive men you can make attempts a little rough around the edges. Woodrow Call is actually a great example of this, since his character isn't emotionally expressive or good at emotional expression (written by a man, but still a good example). Men use humor when a touchy subject is on the table. Try adding some jokes. Sharing emotions can be a hard thing for some men, so try making it hard to speak their true emotions. They can stumble on words or they come out all wrong. If you can have their mental filters stop working while trying to be sensitive that works.
Male friendships are hard to grasp for us women. Three basic ideas should be heeded. The first is that men don't want to get vulnerable (share their feelings about their friends) with other men because they fear a loss of respect. They'll share only after someone respects them no matter what, and even then it's terrifying. Second, they do care deeply about their friends, but not the same way we women do. They ask about success and status, not feelings. Someone got promoted? That'll dominate the conversation. New favorite toy (power tool, 3D printer...)? That'll be a conversation starter. New truck or tractor? Big news. They are interested in the conquests of those they care about. Third, respect - with a capital RESPECT. This creates competition, one-upping, and insults (playful or not). The level of friendship directly correlates to respect levels. No respect for someone? Forget friendship.
"Every single time a man approaches another man, instincts older than time are present. He will size up the other man, even briefly, to figure out if the guy is a threat or not. Six thousand years of instinct have taught men that ignoring each other’s strength is a guaranteed way to lose everything you value...When you write a male friendship, look for their inequalities and see if they can build a relationship out of mutual respect for each other's different strengths. This can be a lot more interesting than two chess champions who have more of a rival relationship but no real differences. It can be much more fun to watch a mismatched pair: maybe a klutzy dude who is brilliant in the English language and his Mexican friend who speaks broken English but has a master's degree in mechanical engineering and is brilliant with his hands. The two could respect the heck out of each other and team up for their escapades, playing off each other's strengths and roasting each other's weaknesses. " - Joshua Sword
Conclusion
To sum all this up, get to know the men in your life. Ask questions (directed at the trusted people you know). If you can observe real behavior you'll find a better wire skeleton for your character and have a fully developed one. Behavior in real life modeled on a page is more believable. People-watch and make new friends with men in your life. You'll learn a lot.
From what I've read, I think I've won some respect from male friends. I'm looking specifically at the basketball guys. I observe them and see they take me seriously the better I get at basketball. Am I a pro? No, but I listen to their advice and act on it, making me a better player. I get high fives and encouragement from these guys. I've once again gained more information on my own male friends through blog research. While researching men's attributes, you might get to know your loved ones better. I'd highly suggest it.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
Just for fun (I don't actually believe it'll happen) I'm devoting a post to what could theoretically happen if the zombie apocalypse hit right here, right now. We'll assume the zombies have the same ability as the humans here. Buckle up and prepare your shelters!
Courtesy of Pinterest - from the movie Shaun of the Dead
First, what we assume to be true must be established. We're not at World War Z or old movie zombie speeds. Let's assume and establish the zombies in my scenario can move at the speed of a real human - not at supernatural speed or unearthly slow. Second, let's assume people behave like they do today. We don't idealize the nature of humans here. We know people can and will shove others down to live. It depends on who we are talking about. As a coworker pointed out, any emergency or crisis can cause similar results to the zombie apocalypse, minus a few zombie hordes here and there.
Where you live
The overall picture of city life vs country life comes into play. We have distance between houses out in the rural areas, as well as farms that people live on. In the city, though, we have lots of people crammed in buildings and living on top of each other - typically depending on the grocery store (though country people do, too). It'll look different wherever you live. It may even touch the rural areas only later on (like the depression did).
Another aspect of city life is a lack of gun ownership. Why should you care? Because rural folks have more defense and less chance of dying via zombie. When everyone owns a gun you'll live longer. Think on that. Your city folks that carry are better off, too, but only if they can make it past their apartment building doors and survive their neighbors. One's willingness to shoot something is something to consider, along with the ability to even use a gun.
Courtesy of istock
Communities in both areas can band together to survive either way. The country is probably where you want to be, though. The reason is food supply and distance between homes. You may need to take a few trips to town, but the farms can provide supply for a short time, depending on how large they are. The more self-sufficient you are the better. Cities that require you to survive the street zombies to reach your food supply give you a lower percentage of survival. Zombies also have to travel longer distances to reach homes, and even then most rural homes have guns somewhere. I predict that if it ever happened cities would become death traps.
Social media and other news sources
It'd be all over the internet in hours. We all know this. Mass chaos would ensue. Work? Who cares? I'm not risking my neck. The world would lock down and come to a standstill. No one would want to leave their homes and many would not answer doors. Guns would be placed in prominent places all over the homes of anyone who wished to live.
The stores. Oh, the stores. If you thought Covid was bad...Stealing and a mad rush to buy supplies to last you weeks and months would ensue. Supplies would run out. You'd be fighting for baked beans and bread. I imagine we'd all be running for gun ammo, too. It'd be an awful mess. The zombies would probably swarm the stores later on. Not only do you need more food, but you'd also risk zombie status going into town. Would anyone even be manning the store? Maybe not. Think Fallout. We might be building bunkers.
Social media brings out the worst in some people. It can make someone do something stupid, or step out onto an unsafe ledge to do a selfie. You've probably seen the woman who hung off a building by her friend's hand to get a cool picture. That's a real scenario and not fake at all. Some have died for the selfie on the ledge. It's not a joke to do that. In this way, social media challenges and the need for a selfie might kill people who want the zombies in their pictures. One second of a selfie could kill you. If I did write this concept in a story form this would definitely be in the storyline somewhere.
Courtesy of Facebook
The elderly and weak
I work at a nursing home kitchen. What would happen to the elderly? It's a real question. I think some staff would stay and defend, but I really do think some people would bail. Elders of the community would die of medical care neglect and zombies. I also think confused residents would die faster than the ones who were only physically weak. They'd wander out and be eaten faster than anyone else, with the exception of infants and young kids. And suicidal individuals who walk out into zombie hordes to die. I know that sounds dark, but if you really did want to die it's the same concept as walking into the desert without water (which people do all the time).
Courtesy of Revista
Physically weak anyone would die faster. Who are we kidding? Can't walk without help? Better hope you can be carried. Blind? Dead faster than your white cane hit the zombie's foot. People are selfish. You could be injured trying to escape and die when someone tramples you to live. Any medical condition like diabetes could kill you. Medical supplies would be hoarded like food. Young or old, if you need medication to live you could die of medical need before you even get attacked by a zombie. Hospitals could have flighty staff, too. Any care facility can have staff who bail on their people.
Doomsday preppers
We know these people can be prepping bunkers. Some have bunkers and some places had bunkers from the fifties already on the property, including a hotel with a bunker in West Virginia (prepped so the gov't could still run while down there). These people will be fine. Anyone they take in will be fine. Whatever they were prepping for aside (from Russians to liberals to people who did prep for zombies), you can't deny some people will go underground and emerge from their vaults after this blows over. And the population is much lower.
The average population might not be doing this. Some will laugh like they saw Noah prepping the ark with no bad weather in sight. Yet, to be a Noah is good here. You'll have a higher chance of living after all this. And probably your neighbor's yard and property when they die. Again, dark, but realistic.
Places to gather
Where you'll likely find the people who reach out to help is the church and relief organizations. Places like this are built to help people, worked by people with big hearts. People who care about other people will stay. There will certainly be more praying. It stands to reason that places with extra food will be sought out. Churches were deemed essential during Covid. Why would they not be in this scenario? People would want to know what is going on and seek answers. If the Zombie apocalypse isn't a call to cling to God with reckless abandon, what is?
Any building with supplies is a neon sign for people to come. Really, that's the truth. People banded together can survive together. Churches are just one example. Community centers can be like this, too. Depending on the risk and how many zombies there are, you could all meet to make a community plan. Small towns where everyone knows everyone would likely do this.
Travel
Going anywhere is suddenly dangerous. You need to check with someone in the area to ensure you don't walk into a newly-swarmed town and die. Keep your toddlers and infants in your arms and on leashes. If you don't keep an eye on those kids they might be zombies later on. Getting gas will be vital. Charging your car will also be vital. Don't get stranded. Depending on where you are, it's possible you don't have someone near enough to pick you up. The only problem with cars is their sound.
Walking any distance is a peril in this scenario. Biking might be better, but only if you have no car. A lockable car is far safer than walking out in the open. I imagine most people carry weaponry in this present scenario. Be sure you have a backpack of supplies and only what you need. Cars can carry more than a person on a bike.
Stranger danger will be a real problem in your travels, depending on where you are. If everyone has a weapon, it stands to reason that unstable people are out there using it on more than just zombie hordes. Serial killers have historically taken advantage of war-torn places. There are friendly people willing to help, but there are also the desperate and crazy. You take the gamble when you greet a traveling party. It's on you to feel out whether you can sit around a fire with them or you need to move on. Maybe you need to run whenever they come within your sight range.
The Aftermath
Alright, everyone, let's calm down. Once the virus has passed and the zombie horde has been eradicated (or at least trapped and under control) we need to restart society with the living members left. We have to get the doomsday preppers out of their cellars, find the survivors, and get some law and order back online. That'll take months. The first step is sending the safety signal to those that hid in their homes the whole time. You do that and maybe some will crawl out immediately. Others will wait a few weeks to ensure this isn't a trap.
Finding survivors requires a party of people willing to do double-duty. Our posse is also our law and order. I'm assuming society is lawless right now. Some areas might have control due to military and police presence (cities mostly), but out in the country we have less of that. The posse or posses must be willing to lay down the law like the old marshals used to. Rescue workers might step up for this job. They'll need to bring medical experience with them to succeed. Between medical workers and law, the posses'll easily be formed.
Towns and buildings'll need some TLC after all this chaos. Putting towns back in shape is a major task. This'll take months, too. Depending on who's left, some places could have multiple abandoned homes and a lower population compared to the number of built homes. Also, factories and powerplants are currently not being worked and no one should go into one without caution and the protection of chemical-proof clothing. Radiation is not harmless.
I wrote a book! I am delighted to say that I have 5 five-star reviews up on Amazon now, which is amazing. I hope you like it, too. If you're interested in buying a paperback, hardcover, or ebook version go to my website link in this blog or click here to go straight to my Amazon page.
Jack Thomas is running from a past case. He's hiding in Wrenville. Is his past case catching up with him?
Find out in my first book, Wrenville, a stand-alone suspense novel.
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