Theatre history and etiquette

Theatre has been hit hard by Covid 19. We all know this. In honor of the opening and lifting of regulations due to Covid, let's dive into some theatre facts you didn't know before. 

Theatre (live theatre) is an art form that created the modern films you know and love. Why is it important? Look around you and tell me what DVDs and TV shows you love most, then imagine that live theatre never happened and acting was never a profession. Most of our entertainment stemmed from live theatre. Let's honor and give that fact some respect with some wacky, strange, and weird trivia. Go buy tickets to the next live show you can see, too. Support the live theatre experience as much as you support our movie theatres, please. Without the live theatre experience, you would never have modern theatre and your Netflix favorites. 

Broadway

For those who don't know, off-broadway is not based on geography. It is actually based on the number of seats. Shows move from off-off-Broadway and move up to Broadway if they are considered good enough. Broadway has 500 seats, off-Broadway has 100-499 seats, and off-off-Broadway has less than 100 seats. Some shows that are produced don't make it all the way to the Broadway stage. 

Women In Theatre

Today we show women on the stage regularly, but there was a time when women were not allowed onto it or were scandalized by being on it. The church forbid it for a while. Shakespearean plays had young boys in corsets to play women. A select few theatres offer the true Shakespeare experience, but they don't do that anymore in most places. It makes it a little uncomfortable to know that Juliet is a young boy kissing a grown man. King Charles II made it a requirement that women fill women's roles later on.

The Renaissance actors were only men, exclusively. December 1660 was the first known actress in Othello, playing Desdemona. Opera opened up more opportunities for women, mostly. So did Burlesque. They were still being told "no" by culture, but they no longer cared. Women in the theatre lost their reputations and gained some sort of social freedom. Women were supposed to be home, not in public oftentimes.

Odd Superstitions

There are some odd beliefs in theatre communities, and one of which is not to say "good luck". Because it was believed there were creatures in the theatre that tried to sabotage things, you say the opposite of what you want to happen. Weird? Yes, but it still exists as a theatre rule today. 

Theatre "ghosts" are common, weirdly. I'm not sure why. Sometimes to "appease theatre ghosts" a single light is left on all the time. Also, some theatres have seats permanently opened for theatre ghosts. Why this place attracts ghosts may be a constant mystery, but I do know that theatre ghosts are somewhat common. I have seen unexplainable things in two theatres or heard stories about apparitions in theatres I've attended, so we may never know what is supernaturally going on. 

Macbeth is never said by name because the production is said to come with bad luck. It is "the Scottish play" in a theatre. Also, some believe the curses in the play from the three witches are real witchcraft. The cleansing ritual for saying the name of the play in the theatre is to leave the theatre and spit over your shoulder, spin and brush yourself off, or recite a line from another Shakespeare play. 

Don't whistle backstage. The fly system used to be controlled by sailors that were hired by theatres. A whistle poorly timed could kill an actor. Whistling came before the computer systems to control what is done when. 

Apparently, when you have a bad dress rehearsal you will have a great performance. You perform better as you make mistakes. It may or may not be actually true, but it is a theatre superstition nonetheless. 

Odd Theatre Terminology

If you hear something about going down to "Hell" or up to the "Heavens" it is referring to the trapdoor in the floor or the ceiling of the theatre. You are not really going to Hell if you exit the stage through "Hell". 

Stage blocking is also not what you think. See the diagram below for the basics. 

Etiquette

I have these rules of etiquette burned into my soul, and this applies to concerts and movie theatres (in some cases), too. The performing arts should be treated with respect. Actors are sensitive creatures who need reassurance of their importance and their ability to act well. Therefore, the below rules are to be applied to everything live theatre and live performance. 

1. If you must leave, do so at intermission where the actors won't see you. If you know you can't come to the whole performance - DON'T. Should you urgently have to use the restroom and intermission is over, do it at a scene change and come in at a scene change (and hurry up in silence). In the case of a musical concert, you can leave or come between musical pieces/songs. This rule does not need to be followed in a movie theatre, where actors can't see you and you can buy the movie later after release (though it is still annoying for a crowded theatre). Live theatre is not a movie theatre and you can't replay a scene later because you had to leave for work.

2. Unless audience participation is part of the performance, remain silent. This rule can be applied in movie theatres, too. Nothing is worse than someone talking through a live theatre show and you not being able to rewind, thus live theatre is a place this rule applies doubly. You can laugh at the comedy, ooh and ah at scenes, and cry at sad parts - just don't interrupt the flow of the performance by yelling at actors. Frankly, this rule applies to any preacher or speaker you ever encounter. 

To be clear, I have seen a pastor get their flow interrupted by a churchgoer yelling a retort that was uncalled for. That pastor is someone I work for. It made me angry for more than one reason, but one reason I was angry was that this rule was burned into my being due to all my life experience in the arts. The only thing anyone should yell up at a pastor is "Amen!". Additionally, no actor should have to deal with drunken people interrupting a show by screaming at actors onstage. That, too, is wrong. Show respect to your speakers and actors of any type. I don't care what they said, what they look like, or how badly the actor is acting - you need to respect anyone speaking to or performing for you. 

3. Put the phones away. Your text can wait. This applies to any speaker, pastor, movie theatre, musical performance, or live show. If you truly have a life emergency that is an exception. Most people who are going to shows are not in that situation (give or take first responders and police). This is a common courtesy and theatres of any kind tell you to turn them off in the first place (no, not vibrate - off!). Don't call your friend in the middle of the show, either, or an usher might escort you out. If you must call someone for news of an emergency, go out to the lobby at the next scene change. Come back at the scene change after you return. Actors can see you come in and out, as well as your shiny phone screen. In the case of movie theatres, it just disrupts everyone else. Don't be that human. If a phone does go off, don't respond with loud annoyance, because that is worse than the phone.

Also related to phones and devices is the matter of illegal and pirate recordings. Yes, please turn off all devices that aren't medical and don't pirate shows online (as much as people like to watch them). We arts people have to make money somehow. Tickets have to be sold. Broadway will scream at you for it. 

4. Snack quietly and don't bring a full dinner to a show (unless it is served to you at a dinner show). Believe it or not, some have brought a full meal to a live show. Movie theatres might discourage this, too, but they might not know if you do this. Also, unwrap things before the scenes begin to avoid crinkling during quiet scenes because slow unwrapping does not make it better. If you snack clean up after yourselves. 

5. Come on time. You can't rewind anything. You will disrupt the seated people who are on time if you come late. Give yourself time to get your snacks, drinks, and read the playbill. At lights down be seated. 

 

6. Get tickets ahead! You will thank yourself when the performance gets sold out and you have one. Those who don't heed the warning have to wait and see if someone doesn't show up. Covid will increase the need to do so, I guarantee it. This goes doubly if you are bringing a large group. Have those group tickets before the seats are all taken up. Be a Boyscout and be prepared. Ticket staff and ushers will thank you for your consideration. 

7. Don't block aisles. Why? Because often actors use them in the course of the show. Nothing is worse than being an actor who has to rush down an aisle, only to trip on a woman's purse or man's jacket. Keep your stuff at your feet. Don't throw anything onstage, either. 

8. Use the restrooms before you get into the theatre, during the intermission, and after the show. I understand if you have health issues that make it impossible to hold your bladder but do try to. If you know you can't make it through a show because of this, maybe just get a DVD or stream a movie instead of seeing live theatre.

Sources:

https://www.blaketheater.com/theater-etiquette/

 https://www.whatsonstage.com/london-theatre/news/20-amazing-theatre-facts_34626.html

https://dramatics.org/why-do-theatre-people-believe-weird-stuff/

https://www.folger.edu/shakespeares-theater

https://nctheatre.com/blog/women-theatre-historical-look

https://www.radford.edu/content/cvpa/home/theatre/current/know/etiquette.html

https://broadwaydirect.com/theater-etiquette-dos-donts-attending-broadway/

https://www.whatsonstage.com/london-theatre/news/women-in-theatre-eight-facts_45974.html

https://www.writerstheatre.org/blog/gender-shakespeares-stage-history/

Pictures:

The British Library

Memes

Stage Faves

Movies so bad they're hilarious

You heard about The Room? Well, it was not watched for quality. Some films get watched for mocking purposes. The Room was truly a disaster that was shown again for laughs (when it wasn't actually a comedy!). How many other disaster artists are there? Let's dive into that. 

Fun fact, there is a filmmaker by the name of Neil Breen that is truly something else (and by something else I mean.....just interesting). I once showed a professor (one who knew how to make good films) a clip of Breen's work. He had no words. The filmmakers I'm talking about today produced movies that are so bad they are hilarious. It was never intended to be a comedy and we are laughing at it. 

Manos: The Hands of Fate

I'm actually going to start with one that is so bad this mere clip is enough to leave me laughing at the quality of it. If you can sit through this whole movie you are stronger than I. 

The clip above is from Manos: The Hands of Fate. I'd imagine that you couldn't fake this laughing stock of a movie if you tried. The plot itself is a reason not to waste the hours you can never get back. 

The plot is that a family gets lost and trapped at the home of a devil-worshipping man and his servant Torgo. This man then wants the mother of the family and wants to deface her with burning hands. It already sounds bad. The acting alone in this clip is enough to leave me wondering if the director was on acid. 

Neil Breen Films

Neil Breen has made several films, and surprisingly, has a cult following. Are any of his films good? No, but they are comedy gold. These films are Double Down, Pass Thru, Twisted Pair, Fateful Findings, and I Am Here ....Now. If you want to watch a man destroy several laptops and comedically focus on distrust of the government you found the right film. 

I don't think a paragraph on Breen will do his awful and comedic films justice. Allow me to show you why. I suggest watching the full movie for the full experience, just to understand the unnatural dialogue flow, bad acting, and writing. 

The Room

This one got put out in theatres again - for being the worst/best movie and so others could watch and laugh all over again. You know it is a bad film if the main character kills himself and the filming is so bad you are too busy laughing at the quality of the scene. Yeah, this isn't an award winner. 

However, if you want to waste a few hours and a whole bowl of popcorn, be aware of sex scenes......and from what others have said, they are truly awful. I did not watch those scenes. Just know they are there. There are nine of them. 

Birdemic 1 and 2

Take The Birds and give it a less-than-college-student budget. Then hire the worst director ever. And edit it poorly. The video below is by JonTron, who does a good job of highlighting the "good" parts. 

Sharknado

Yes, let's not forget this one. Sharks, lots of sharks, and cheesy acting. In fact, let me show you a few scenes.

Conclusion

This has been the so-bad-it's-good movies list. I know many people have different standards of bad, however, these are undeniably bad and inspire laughter, and maybe a cult following. I know filmmaking isn't easy, but....wow.

Sources:

https://screenrant.com/best-so-bad-theyre-good-movies-ranked-rotten-tomatoes-scores/

IMDB.com

https://25yearslatersite.com/2020/10/30/who-is-he-what-is-he-the-films-of-neil-breen/

Pictures:

Vagebond's Movie ScreenShots

Historical Debutante Balls

Bridgerton is all the rage these days, and that leads us to the accuracy of the series. Debutante balls, upscale society, etc.... Without further adieu, let's go into it.

Every series is not without historical inaccuracies unless it is a documentary. Historical fiction is not exact, but close enough. I am not going to compare my research to Bridgerton because of the sheer amount of articles already published on that topic. I'll let you compare my research to the drama on Netflix yourselves. 

Where the tradition comes from 

England is the start of our research journey. The idea was that at a certain age women were presented to society to find a husband of similar or higher social standing. They were often accompanied by a large dowry. The debutantes were debuted in seasons, like when the families were all in the same area. The end goal is to have a ring on your hand and a husband. If you failed to catch a man after 3 seasons and you were 30 you'd be considered a spinster. There was shame connected with this. The season was referred to as marriage marts. 

If you have noticed that debutante balls in movies have women announced with a relative you are seeing an accuracy. The formal entrance is held and dinner is served. There might be speeches. Then there is dancing. Family members of the debutante may give gifts, but guests aren't expected to. 

The thing is that social rules are abundant here, tiny ones that we consider a tad over-polite. Personal compliments, for example, can be made by only personal friends, unless someone was quite old. Aquaintances would comment on dresses and be in bad taste. "Coming out" parties were not associated with homosexuals or bisexuals here, nor would these people have been accepted by anyone. In this case, the young women get flowers at their "coming out" in society. Some parks were good places to get attention and run into the opposite sex. Brothers or fathers would accompany them while riding.

The age of maturity was not a number. If you completed your education and were emotionally ready to come out in society it was allowed. An accomplished woman here could speak several languages, do several art forms like embroidery or musical talents, memorized the members of the monarchy, learned history and geography, learn to host parties, and still give birth to multiple children. Yes, that much, and somehow not go insane. None of these women could be air-heads and get far in life. 

Court Gowns and Dresses

The wedding gowns of white silk look similar to the white silk court gowns that were worn in this period of time when presenting to the Queen. Some women converted these into wedding dresses. Some also were married in darker dresses that could be used another day. The white silk dresses were a requirement - and no cream would do! You had to have gloves and properly heeled shoes. 

Short version - black tie standards for guests.

Dresses in general started with undergarments. If you thought bras were a pain in the butt you ought to hop in your time machine and put on these! Firstly, drawers (capri-like pants) followed by a slip, corset, petticoat, camisole, bustle, underskirt, and skirt/jacket. In this way, the undergarments were the only dirty things to wash. 

Who Could Participate

Alright, so here's the fun part - you had to be elite. In this way, some bachelors married common women who came out at smaller balls and debuted in small parties. They understood all the criteria were nearly impossible to meet and many women carried themselves better, but couldn't meet it. 

Debutantes of aristocracy were expected to be here. Daughters of clergy, military or naval officers, physicians, and barristers were also eligible for the honor of being presented to the Queen for the season. Lots of women came out in smaller parties and tea parties, but were never presented to the queen. Only a handful of women were presented to the Queen and attended court functions.

Callers and Courting

To call on someone you could do as little as leaving your card, as well as take turns on the dance floor with a lady, invite her guardian or father to visit, have dinner with the family, or have a chaperoned walk. Courting could take years or months. Some women started the season with a match lined up. 

Courting has a long list of rules that developed, some of them that weren't established in 1813 and others that were. These crushing social rules weren't all there in 1800s and some were added in 1900s. Keep in mind that not all these were 1800s and I'm not sure what year the rules were established.

1. Never go out alone with a gentleman, especially at night 

 2. Never address a gentleman without an introduction

3.Never receive a man alone - be chaperoned

4. No physical contact

5. Courting men could only offer their hand if the road was rough

6. flirting was done with a fan

7. no night dates, and men can't stay long

8. no walks with gentleman - even in courtship

9. only male relatives in a closed carriage

10. men can't invite women over

11. engaged men kept their eyes only to their ladies

12. no sexual behavior before engagement

13. no politics or intelligence required

Marriage began with courtship, which began with conversation, walks, and company. Next was engagement, which meant walks alone, holding hands in public, and unchaperoned rides. Still no night dates, though. Marriage was last, but it had to be the same or higher status. If we dated like this I suspect divorces would be lessened, yet I don't suggest it for the modern man or woman.

Courting women couldn't accept luxurious gifts from men, but it was acceptable to give books, sugary candies, flowers, and sheet music (my kind of gifts). It was bribery to give expensive gifts to a woman not engaged to or related to you. Men and women had different standards, clearly, so that might be another day's topic, but you get the point. Courting is not a light matter. 

Language of Fanning

Fans were flirting. Believe it or not, Tim Burton used this in Alice In Wonderland. It was a language of women and it was acceptable flirting, unlike the ways we flirt today. 

The list below is how to communicate without words. 

fan fast: I'm independent

fan slow: I'm engaged

fan with right hand in front of face: come on

fan with left hand in front of face: leave me

fan open and shut: kiss me

fan open wide: love

fan half open: friendship

fan shut: hate

fan swinging: can I see you home?

I imagine lots of signals were sent in one ball and we wouldn't notice in our society. Watch time period dramas again and look at the fans. What are the women saying?

Sources:

http://www.katetattersall.com/coming-out-during-the-early-victorian-era-debutantes/

http://www.angelpig.net/victorian/debutante.html

https://www.doulike.com/article-an-online-dating-guide-to-courting-in-the-victorian-era

http://nitsas.com/blog/debutante-season-rules-and-rituals/

Pictures:

Decider

Victorian-era.org

Teaching Introverts

Introverts know all too well that public education, camps, and even society as a whole are based on extroverts. We are tired of being told we need to be fixed. Half the world is introverted, so why are we being taught like extroverts? Teachers, you can help us learn better and be more comfortable in your classrooms and camps. Listen carefully and let me invite you into this discussion.

I understand that you have to teach both extroverts and introverts in the same classroom. I understand that you are responsible for all the kids at camp and that a bored child can become trouble rather quickly. I just want to make it clear that introverts are often overwhelmed with group activities for long periods of time, being called out publicly and put on the spot, and generally being forced into any spotlight. Yes, we learn to do extroverted things, but only because we were forced into it at a young age and we need to survive out in the world. We hate small talk, yet we learn to do it for work and other functions, all while being bored out of our minds and wanting to disappear into books. 

Having trouble identifying the introverts in the room? Look for small social groups. We also take a minute to think, yet we concentrate deeply. We observe more than speak. We avoid large crowds. Introverts are defined as introspective people who need social recharge time. We run our mental processes and thoughts through long-term memory, not short-term, so we need a pause to process and react. We open up and speak in smaller groups and private places. We are not built for long social periods of time. We are half the world. You know an introvert in your life - I guarantee it. We are called shy by those who don't understand that "shy" is not "introverted" and we don't need to be fixed. Shy is anxiety, but introverted is that we need process time. Introverts are often forced to socialize by today's standards of normality when we are running on empty socially, so be understanding when finding these people in your camp group or classroom. If they look socially exhausted leave them to themselves and they may perk up. 

Camps

Camps are full of fun activities and never dull. Constant activities are generally not fun for the introverted personality, who needs time to process and breathe. Yet, counselors have to herd the kids into activities all day because they are told kids left on their own get into trouble. In some cases, I know that to be true, but not all. Please let a socially exhausted child read a book in the cabin, or just sit with them. Unless you know someone is playing you, of course. Counselors are responsible for all the kids that live in their cabin. I know. I was one once. 

Most camps have a choice in activities and some of the time there is the freedom to chill. I'm not saying camps are awful. I enjoyed them. I just know that competitions are also not the most fun for us introverted kids. An over-competitive group will cause stress to a kid that isn't competitive in nature, especially if you are losing constantly and your group generally sucks at stuff. That sounds crude, but it is true of one camp experience I had. I also had the opposite experience, where a leader said 'do your best, have fun, but I don't care how we rank'. Ironically, the latter made us do better in rank than the former. As a counselor or leader, please don't pressure competition, even if you want the trophy. You may just get the trophy without the pressure-cooking, so relax. 

Leaderships should be mixed in extrovert and introvert ratio, ideally. Why? Because introverted kids need a role model on how to balance themselves in the world. An introverted leader can be related to, thus they can ask for advice and have support in hard moments. A leader that is attentive to both personalities (extroverted or introverted is not important here) will do well to lend support to both, unifying the kids under him or her. Friends are created in unified groups. This is the idea of camp groups. Done well, this concept is amazingly good at bonding kids. 

Depending on the ages and if your crowd is mixed, you may deal with flirting. Yes, this is important. pay attention to this subject. Notice who is cozy with whom and be aware of the drama that could form into a storm. Introverts and drama are a bad mix, which leads to the introvert becoming overwhelmed and hiding or retracting from the group dynamic. Yes, we may flirt, too, but if we do that is our own fault (speaking from experience), but still talk to that kid and help them learn how to fix it. Teach us young how to avoid drama, please. 

The Classroom

The public education system makes it hard to support an introvert because we are surrounded by people constantly and they try to fix us. We are looked upon with concern if we don't want to play a game or need space. It may be a good idea to create options for big projects that support all personalities. One of the biggest problems include group projects and speeches where we are put in the spotlight or have to deal with a lot of other humans. We like individual projects, in short, where we turn in our paper and don't stand in front of the class with everyone staring at us. 

Theatre is weird. This is one space where I can be someone else for a while and blow some peoples' minds by putting on a performance on stage with no fear. Yet, I can't do a speech without having a mental freeze-up. It's like my mental computer freezes and all my preparations were for nothing, yet if I have a script memorized I can do it almost perfectly. This is because we don't know the reaction of our audience in speeches, but when we go on a stage, everything is going to go how we expect and rehearsed. Predictability makes all the difference. The stage is predictable, but our outside conversations and speeches are just the opposite. Peer reflection that says we "look unprepared" because we mentally froze doesn't help us in any way. Please remember this and be understanding. 

Forced participation is a subject that you need to know about from the start of your lesson plans. Give us several options, please, because the more willing we are to do something the better the project will be. It is human nature that when you require someone to do something they don't want to they won't do anything past the bare minimum. They can even stop engaging, in some cases, so be kind and let us show you what we can do best, simply by giving students introverted and extroverted options to choose from. I also advocate throwing out the participation grade part of your lesson plan or giving us a form of participation that isn't verbal. 

Group projects are hard or easy depending on the size of groups you put us in and the people. Large groups make it hard to get a word in because we want to sound dignified. By the time we mentally rehearse (yes, rehearse) our thoughts the topic is gone or we get interrupted time and again. Small groups of four may be like this if someone takes over, but it is still better to have more openings to speak than fewer. The quality of people makes these worse or better. Either way, it is a million times easier to work alone for us, because we don't depend on the rest of the group for anything. If you do have groups, make them small.

In General

If you described us introverts as quiet, shy, sensitive, or any similar word you probably influenced the reactions toward us. You didn't think about it, I'm sure, but it happened all the same. Presenting us as sensitive makes people treat us carefully and the word quiet makes people approach us like a birdwatcher approaches a bird. I, personally, am hard to offend, so sensitive is not the best word to use for me (though it is true I'm sensitive emotionally to a degree). Kids will treat us differently if you describe us in this way. 

This goes for every student; acknowledge our strengths and what we bring to the table. Please don't do so by bragging about us, however (so uncomfortable!). In this way, a book nook or quiet area of the classroom might not be a bad idea. Truly, that would make indoor recess more fun. Introverts will thank you. Even better, add a quiet part of the day to the curriculum and lesson plans. We pick up on this and hit our recharge button. You get more interaction from us as an added benefit. Show an introvert how to thrive in their element. 

Our thoughts come through less verbal mediums, like journals and social media (yes, that can make you think we're extroverted). Support us and give us time to think before you automatically jump into a large-scale class discussion. Maybe we could journal our thoughts first, or you could give us other options for this project. There are lots of nonverbal ways to hear our thoughts, so let us speak to you. In this vein of thinking, focusing on the quality of the participation is far better. Do us favors - we get enough criticism for our temperament already. Do let us know when we are transitioning into another activity.

Handle issues quietly. Seriously, this means the world to us. Loudly proclaiming our failures or mistakes is humiliating and humiliating a child is probably the worst embarrassment you can hand us. I distinctly remember forgetting my one scrap of paper for the concert, and even though I memorized it they persisted to embarrass me by handing me a paper and insisting on it - which proclaimed my failure to a whole crowd of parents and my classmates. They didn't mean to do this. I know that. Don't do the same to a student in your classroom. One on one private meetings are great places to talk and fix things in quiet. 

Speaking of unnecessary help, let us learn by ourselves at times. Yes, we are students, but if we didn't ask for help and you constantly treat us "special" it can be humiliating (for both reasons of excelling and failure). Let us explore. If we are truly drowning in a subject aid us privately, ideally, or find us a tutor. Proclaiming failure is a bad idea and that student won't trust you, let alone tell you what they need in a classroom to thrive. They will drown further, instead. Trust is everything here. Another point to make here is that when we speak we are often interrupted; don't make us deal with this in an educational environment and prove to us you are further untrustworthy. 

No emotional security means we don't learn well. Should I not feel secure being myself somewhere, I withdraw and learn less. Add bullies and you get a classroom that is not acceptable to introverts trying to learn. Humiliation also takes away emotional security, which can be said as trust. We go into our own world instead. Pay attention to this. It could mean they are bored or it could be they withdrew into themselves. There is a difference, so be prepared to observe further if you see us withdraw.

 Sources:

https://www.weareteachers.com/support-introverts-in-the-classroom/

https://www.ef.com/wwen/blog/teacherzone/tips-teaching-introverts/

https://www.teachthought.com/pedagogy/teaching-introverts-is-different/

https://www.partnersforyouth.org/rubys-story-understanding-introversion-in-a-youth-camp-environment/

Pictures:

John Spencer

Introvert, Dear

Ranker

sex in books and Christianity

 Sex. It is why you exist and why you are sitting reading this blog, believe it or not. It is a natural thing for humans to do. We were built for it. Should it be depicted in fiction? Let's take a look at the pros and cons. 

I'm looking at this from a Christian perspective. I am also going to define some things right out of the gate. 

Erotica - literature written with the intended purpose of arousing the audience

Pornography - representations in word or image that are designed to arouse the audience

I'm going to make a point in saying that erotica and porn are purposely trying to turn on their audience. It is not accidental. It will not be a subtle one-paragraph of sex that does this. Fifty Shades of Gray is a whole book of sex, as an example (which I have never read and think it's trash all the same). I do not endorse a display that purposely tries to arouse your reader. You have to understand that most romantic suspense and romance novels that have a real plot and have historical context are not porn or erotica by the standards above (but if you think that the above definition fits any book you are probably reading one of the above).

One to two pages of a sex scene show up in lots of adult suspense and romances. Like I said, it doesn't fit the definition of erotica and porn in most cases. One vague sex scene is not erotica - but several detailed and obnoxiously corny sex scenes (cough cough, Fifty Shades of Gray, cough cough) are pornographic. I'd like you to know this for the rest of this blog. 

Also, I don't plan to write any sex scenes, as a writer, but wanted to know what the Christian views were. In general, it kind of surprised me. Below you will find what I found. This is all research.

The Christian Perspective for Readers

Readers, I have heard both sides of the coin on reading sex scenes. I am actually going to focus on writers for most of the blog, so here is your part of this. It is your choice to open a book, correct? I have a list of questions to run through with books including sex, for guidance. Unfortunately, I run into discussions on Fifty Shades of Gray every time I ask the internet, but I'm not asking about that book.

1. Does it glorify unhealthy and dark sexual acts?  -  If yes, it might not be the best thing to read.

2. Is the whole book sex (good or otherwise)?  - If no, you are fine, if I understand correctly.

3. Does it fall under the erotica definition above?   - see above response. If no, you're fine. 

4. Lust or love?  -  If you are reading pure lust, I'd stop and put it back.

5. Do you feel controlled by the content? - Stop reading if this is true.

The problem I'm seeing is that if we say nothing about sex (as the church) we leave people ignorant and others can lead them to it the wrong way. On the same token, sex can become a trap for some individuals. What do you do? Consult God. If you have the Holy Spirit He will convict you and lead you in what to read and what to leave alone. 

God let Solomon write a sex poem. I take this as an omen that God isn't totally opposed to it - and that it matters what wording we read it in and our maturity. If you feel tempted by it to sin put it back on the shelf, but if not and there are only a few scenes there you might be fine. The problem is that every source labels any sex erotica in Christian sources (all or nothing perspective), so is Song of Solomon automatically erotica? If so, how did it get into our bible if erotica is all sex in books and not to be read? It doesn't make sense to say Song of Solomon is sinful to read when it is in our Bible. I think you see my dilemma. I have no clear answer to give. God created sex, yes, but I think that addressing lust and sexual addiction is the problem. It only becomes a problem if it controls you. Discern carefully. Give it to God first, then go from there. I wish I had a clearer answer, but I don't. Read the verse below and I hope it helps you discern. 

Mark 7:18-23 NIV

18“Are you so dull?” he asked. “Don’t you see that nothing that enters a person from the outside can defile them? 19For it doesn’t go into their heart but into their stomach, and then out of the body.” (In saying this, Jesus declared all foods clean.) 20He went on: “What comes out of a person is what defiles them. 21For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder, 22adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. 23All these evils come from inside and defile a person.”

For the Writers in the Room

Yes, there are Christian authors who don't write in the Christian fiction section. Yes, they do write love scenes. Yes, God did create us for sex. No, a steamy sex scene does not belong in every book in the library. Use it only when it is believable if you feel comfortable writing it. I found some guidelines from an author that outlines when to use it and why. The reasons below are from Sherrie Hansen's blog (a link will be in the sources below). She believes that sexual desire in characters is honesty about the human race. She is also Christian.

1. It has to have a point and reveal relevant details about the characters themselves. It has to have a point. It has to be relevant to the plot. If you can cut it out of the book and not have to edit anything else, you need to delete that entire scene.

2. There has to be some sort of repercussions and change in the characters after the sex. People are bonded by it. Someone becomes pregnant. It has to affect the relationships of the people in the plot.

3. Write it respectfully, honestly, and portray it as the gift God gave us. Sex is beautiful in its own way and may be a sin outside of marriage, but it is still fun (I'm told). 

4. It should have a lesson. When done in the right way it will be beautiful. When done in the wrong circumstance it can be disastrous. 

Your audience will have entirely different tolerances to sex scenes and the level of emotional heat. Some, like me, tolerate it for the sake of the other content. Others don't want to read it at all. Some could read 15 pages of sex and not even blush. 15 pages of sex are too much and are probably crapola in general, but you get my point. No one person is the same. 

There is a cheat to sex scenes that lots of writers use - hinting about it. Put simply, you suggest that they are about to have sex or show them after sex, but never show the sex. It is easier than writing the actual steamy scene. I do this in my writing if I want to suggest that sex was had or was about to be done. Less is more allows the audience to use their own imagination without plunging them into a "Woah! That's not what I asked for!" description. It's nice if you didn't read the romance for a vivid sex scene and want more plot. However, if you want to write it please add emotional significance to it.

Your thought life is your thought life. Do not blame another human for your struggles. Fight your battles and decide whether it is okay to read it or not. If you open a book with sex in it (that you knew about already) you actively choose to read it. I don't believe that we should lie about the truths of life and human nature. People break and make mistakes or get married and have beautiful sex. We can't just lie about human nature. Besides, even the Bible itself talks about sex. It was in Eden. It is also noted that it was subtly put into poetry, where young children won't understand it. There is a responsibility to portray it correctly and like God intended, so Christian writers shouldn't be showing abusive sex as normal sex.

There are several other points when writing sex scenes. One of them is that sex is good and it may be misused, but God designed it. Another equally important thought is that it should be depicted appropriately. Christian authors of past times didn't shun sex - so we shouldn't, either. Audiences of different ages are also absorbing sex differently, so know your readers before you write the scene. It is to be considered that we are responsible to portray sex appropriately, but we are not responsible for the sin of our readers. Showing the brokenness of our world is not, in any way, something to avoid. Show the world a mirror to the face, by all means. We all need God's grace and we need to spread the word - and perfect protagonists don't reveal our brokenness and need for Jesus. Immorality is sin, so don't portray it as something without consequence. Sin is wrong. Write it as such.

Badly Written Sex 

Fifty Shades of Gray is so badly written that even without the pornographic content it is worth nothing. I have said so a few blogs before this. Sex that is horribly written is worse than an unnecessary sex scene and readers will throw the bad work in the trash or mock it with their friends (so, if you heard about the film The Room, that's an example of mocking a form of media). Some books have one awful 12-page sex scene that makes someone stop reading 70 percent through the book (me, I stopped reading). I commit to books and try to finish them, so that's pretty bad! A sex scene should not be 12 pages. 

But wait, there's more! You can earn an award for writing the worst sex scene of the year. The Bad Sex in Fiction Award is a real thing. The award is given for horrible sex scenes in otherwise good fiction. It began in 1993, given by the Literary Review, and was canceled in 2020 because nobody needs bad sex on top of the dumpster fire of 2020, according to the Literary Review.  

The link to the winning participants of past years (that can create good laughs later) is here: https://literaryreview.co.uk/bad-sex-in-fiction-award.

If you are a writer and want to be taken seriously, please don't win the above award. The advice below is how not to write a sex scene. If you can't do it well, take my word as an avid reader and don't do it at all. 

1. If it reveals nothing about your character, you failed. Delete it. 

2. If you ended tension too quickly, delete it.

3.  The quote below is brilliant. Listen to this advice! :

"Most of us take longer to eat a pizza than we do to have sex. So here's a tip:
Write the longest description of eating pizza that you can. Go on a little longer than you think you should. Include smells, tastes, temperature, everything you can.
Now cut it down to a tight paragraph or two.
Print this out, tape it to the wall, and if you’re writing a sex scene longer than that, you’re going on too long."

4. Is it boring and the audience is not close enough? Delete it. 

5. Did you write it because you think you have to? Delete it.

6. Is it more "tell" than "show" (show vs tell is an editing checkpoint in anything, btw)? Rewrite it or delete it.

7. Lastly, sex is not a way to show love by itself - you can do better. It is not the go-to show of attraction you need. I repeat - you can do better.

When writing Young Adult sex scenes (because in some individual cases and situations it is appropriate, if worded correctly and if it is part of the plot) the link here is helpful: https://theconversation.com/honest-and-subtle-writing-about-sex-in-young-adult-literature-48002

Remember your audience, every time, or you may be showing too much or not enough. Someone who is younger will not understand or will see the vaguest sex scene as too awkward. If you are going to insist on sex scenes in young adult fiction, be as vague as you possibly can and don't be graphic. In this case over one paragraph is too much. Word it correctly and carefully. Don't write an adult scene for a young adult reader. The portrayal is everything here. Click the link above. Less is more is an established rule here. Hinting is enough!

Closing Remarks

I am seeing a problem with how some Christian writers view writing sex and what readers are told. Something isn't adding up. Readers are told all sex in books is bad, in some cases, even if the characters are redeemed and face real consequences, or are married. Honestly, it is part of the reason Christian authors don't always end up in the Christian genre of the library. Sometimes we can't talk about touchy subjects in some Christian fiction and it doesn't help. People will only find inaccurate portrayals of sex in other books later, so why aren't we talking about the truthful, beautiful picture of sex in Christian context in our fiction? I understand that if you have lust and porn addiction you shouldn't be reading any sex in books, but not everyone has that problem. Go to God first, above all, before reading. Know your thought life and make a decision with that in mind. 

Writers, I have never written a sex scene (so, all of this is researched). I cheat and show the before or after, but not the sex. I do think that less is more, but I will tolerate a necessary sex scene in my fiction reading to get to the rest of the plot. Christian bubble thinking does not always make some writers and readers feel okay with sex in fiction. "Know your audience" is the best advice any writer can ever get when it comes to touchy subjects. If you want it to be put in your church library you might want to avoid it. It depends if you care. 

I will kindly point out that CS Lewis and JRR Tolkien are not all put into the Christian section, nor do they include sex. It does not make you less Christian to have a book in the mystery, fantasy, or romance section instead of the Christian section. You can still portray Christ's love and grace in a book including sex, if this research is proof of anything, but it isn't a license to put sex in everything. Tolkien and Lewis did just fine without it. If you are going to write it and are determined to do so make it truthful. Do not add to the world's sensual crapola. Christian perspectives on sex need to be put out there; the world's view of sex needs to be challenged should you write a portrayal of sex.

In case you are curious, Tolkien's views of sex are in these links here: https://www.christianunion.org/the-magazine/1240-man-does-not-live-on-sex-alone-tolkiens-words-of-wisdom

https://www.intellectualtakeout.org/article/jrr-tolkien-sex-and-love/

https://ansereg.com/warm_beds_are_good.htm

Should your book be wonderful without sex do not add a steamy scene. Unnecessary sex scenes create trashy novels. Spread the word! 

Pictures:

Pedestrian TV

Nothing in the Rulebook

Sources:

https://sherriehansen.wordpress.com/2016/04/20/is-there-such-a-thing-as-christian-love-scenes/

https://prismaticprospects.wordpress.com/2016/02/19/romance-in-christian-fiction-how-much-heat-is-too-much/

https://barbaraleeharper.com/2010/08/19/sexuality-in-christian-fiction/

https://charitysplace.wordpress.com/2015/02/01/sex-the-christian-writer/

https://storyembers.org/how-should-christian-authors-depict-sex/

https://litreactor.com/columns/what-good-are-sex-scenes

https://theconversation.com/honest-and-subtle-writing-about-sex-in-young-adult-literature-48002

writers and the editing process

 Writers and their written work have a special bond. We write something to life, but then to edit our work, we tear it apart without mercy. After that, it is beautiful again. It isn't easy to criticize the story you spent months writing. Let's talk about it. Join me in discussing the hardships of editing. 

Writing is energizing and fun for me. Editing, on the other hand, is the exact opposite. It takes energy to do it. While necessary, it also means I need to edit in a way that gives me breaks periodically. Good editing shouldn't be rushed. Good editors also cost some money. I have found, personally, that you should edit your work yourself - to the point that you can't see anything wrong with it - and then hire an editor. From there you give an editor a better manuscript to look over. 

There are many ways you can go about editing your writing. Whatever you do, make sure you show it to someone else for a fresh edit. Entrust it to a human who doesn't know it backward and forward. This blog post is all about the many ways you can put your work through the wringer to make it polished and pretty. 

Tips and Tricks

There are editing programs all over the internet. Some can even give you human editors to work with. You can get a free version with less features or the premium version that gives you fancy stuff. You determine if that is worth your money and if you can afford it. Grammarly is very nice and I use it often in the free version. I am still deciding if I want to pay for premium, but the free version is quite nice by itself. 

Line by line will take a long time. This can be done in sections, where you can take breaks in between. If you are going insane doing this stop and rest. Come back later. You can learn a lot by going line by line. You may find common mistakes this way. Along with this you should have a style guide, which will help your manuscript be uniform. 

Don't rely on your computer to catch everything. This applies to every part of editing. Your computer will flag stuff that isn't wrong or won't catch something that is wrong. Be aware of this. In this spirit, it is suggested you read it backwards to catch the spelling errors. Make your brain think twice and it will catch stuff you don't see when reading it in order. 

Reading out loud also catches words you thought you typed - but didn't type - before. We all do it. Our brain autocorrects in ways that make us unaware of our mistakes or wordiness. If you read it from a piece of paper it might make a difference (especially if you change font). Even ask a friend or use a text reader to find awkward wording or missed words. Computers will only see what you typed, in this case, so use a computer to find the mistake here.

Phone a friend. Hire an editor. Have someone else look at your work (if only to give yourself a break). I know it is hard to give your precious book to someone else, lest they hate it, but do it anyway. It will still be beautiful in the end. If you must hear it is awful, hear it when you can fix it - not when you released it into the world and it can hurt your reputation. Reward anyone who volunteers to help - because they are worth more than gold!!!!!!!

                                                

Let it sit in a drawer or be ignored for a bit. Why? Because you need to not stare at it daily. The more time spent away from it, the more mistakes you can spot. Do take a break from it to work on something else. It helps immensely. Fresh perspective after a month or two weeks away from your manuscript is important. A fresh mind sees more than a stressed mind. 

Editing in rounds is a good way to hit the big things and small things. I, personally, go through the plot holes first, then the small grammar and spelling mistakes last, and each type of mistake is one round. Between the rounds take a short writing break and reward yourself with something you enjoy doing, that isn't stressful. Again, a fresh mind is better than a stressed mind when editing. Stressed minds miss mistakes. 

Make sure you correct wordiness on one of your rounds. Readers are not fond of wordiness - at least, some of them aren't, anyway. Please look at the audience when figuring out what words you don't need and what details your plot doesn't need. Your first draft may have some wordiness in it. Your choice of how wordy your sentences are is yours, as long your readers understand you. Cliches are also something to cut out. 

Print it out. Break out the red pens and highlighters. Get your eyes off the screen and onto paper. Mark it up however you like. The old fashioned way is sometimes the best way to mark mistakes. If you are helping a friend edit give them a printed draft that is marked with red pen and page numbers, so that they can go through the electronic copy with the editing marks and page references. 

Most of all, get your first sentence right and learn from the mistakes that you make. Don't make them over and over again (in life and writing!). Learn from your writing journey and study the writers you love, how they write and their style. Mimic what you like and experiment (even if you never intend to send it to publishing). Free-write and edit that for practice, if you like. Proofread last, for sure.

Uncommon words can confuse an audience. Our modern audience is not going to know archaic words (use them if you like - just have them defined in some way). If you use a word make sure the readers in your sights know the word. You can lose readers that get confused. Writers have bigger vocabulary than average, much like avid readers. Know your target audience. 

Passive voice is to be avoided. Also, describe as much as possible. Put your reader in the scene. Make passive voice and description a round of editing by itself. That's the best way to target this type of mistake. Don't be passive or dull. Readers stop reading when they get bored. Another round of editing is repetition, which can get tiring, too. Find synonyms. 

You can get a free editing checklist here: https://jerryjenkins.com/self-editing/ 

Writing in general 

For general writing advice, click this link: https://becomeawritertoday.com/improve-your-writing/

As a writer, I know that your manuscript is practically your child. Editing is hard. You need the time and a peaceful place to write, edit, and research (three different tasks that are not the same). Research often comes before writing. Writing always comes before editing. Do not edit while your write or you will go insane. Do not research while you write or you will face the same thing. Create a structure and place for yourself to do all three things. Writers need this. Even if you are sitting in a coffee shop with a laptop, you need a private space. 

Since editing is the focus of the blog today, I'll let you click the link in this section. I hope I helped my fellow writers and have a good day!

Sources:

https://www.grammarly.com/blog/advice-on-editing/?gclid=Cj0KCQjwsLWDBhCmARIsAPSL3_2MRPdm2OVApH2Uw2_Xrda5btI77zE9MDKtLTYR0rjKIWYIUN7QCt8aAuHJEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

https://www.forbes.com/sites/joeescobedo/2017/07/24/forbes-new-york-times-the-10-best-ways-to-edit-your-copy/?sh=5ccb69fe253e

https://www.masterclass.com/articles/tips-for-editing-your-own-writing

Pictures:

Memes Monkey Discovery Engine

The Mom Who Runs

Write Life

Celadon Books

Your Tango

Gaming and Intellect

Some people think you waste time by gaming. Well, let's look at the research and see how it affects you intellectually. They might be wrong. 

Photo courtesy of Call of Duty

First of all, plenty of games require intellect to even finish. Legend of Zelda has logic and critical thinking puzzles riddled through it, with some side quests that open hidden areas. Try to tell me that this game doesn't need a thinking brain and you will be lying. The same points can be made for Nancy Drew Herinteractive games, any game with logic puzzles, and the interactive ds game novels of Hotel Dusk and Last Window. 

Another point to make here is that it requires the ability to multitask to fight in games. Many enemies coming toward you at once takes the thought to move and hit the right combos, especially in Scott Pilgrim Vs The World. It is not easy to play to the point of the last boss. I am only on level 2. There are no checkpoints in level - only at the beginning and end of each level. It is incredibly frustrating to die at Lucas Lee's hands and have to start over.

                                                        Responsible Adult Gaming

Photo courtesy of Game Reviews

With this topic, I need to say that adulting comes first. Do not neglect adult or student responsibilities to game in your room for hours. That is called obsession. You need to control that. Also, our eyes need a break from screens and it can be a health hazard to game day and night at a constant pace. Please exercise. Please take mental breaks for snacks and water. I care about you, readers. Take care of your eyes and body. 

Sometimes responsible leisure time means taking a break from a game for two weeks until you can make sure you have a handle on life's necessary tasks. I've had to do that before. Obsession is not healthy. Frustration also creates muddled thoughts, so if you get too frustrated back off the game for a day or so to avoid distressing yourself and your family and roommates (by cussing, screaming....etc). Keep stress levels low. It makes a difference in how you play (and clear minds beat games faster and kill Toon Link, in my case, less).

When it has become an obsession it will get in the way of your family, friendships, relationships, and adult tasks. Addiction is a point where someone else has to help you, but keep yourself in check. Anything can become an addiction. This is not exclusive to gaming. If you see that you are not in balance with leisure and adult tasks take the opportunity to take responsibility. Police this yourself. Be the responsible adult I know you are, especially if you have kids. You model good gaming and behavior for your offspring. Your kids do not need to hear you cussing out video game characters out of frustration. 

I have heard of fall-back hobbies and agree with the concept wholeheartedly. Ready Player One makes a point that you shouldn't live in a fantasy world your whole life. We shouldn't be staring at screens for days on end. We need sunlight, people, basic nutrition, and exercise. Fall-back hobbies are any pastimes that don't include gaming, such as creating art, sports, writing, etc... These make it possible to engage your brain without too much screen time. Keep this in mind if you are easily bored. Branch out into other hobbies if you need more stimulation. This will also help you control obsessions over gaming (no guarantees on anything else, though).

Gaming Makes You Smarter

If you are of the older generation you probably have your doubts about this. I don't. I have the research to prove that gaming helps your brain. Should you still feel that a game is negatively impacting someone you know please get them help. Anything can be an addiction (for reference), so please make sure you actually understand what is going on as much as you possibly can. That said, the research below is how games positively impact gamers. The video below explains the actual gaming addiction disorder. Listen to it before you decide your friend or relative is in danger.

Action video games are proven to improve attentional control, which is paying attention to specific things. Spatial awareness is also improved when compared to nongamers. Response times are also faster in gamers, and they anticipated the event that was happening. Action games also improve memory and tasks that use memory retention. Gamers are primed to be sensitive to visual cues and remember more accurately. 3D video games boost memory forming and improve hand-eye coordination and reaction times. Strategy games help older people avoid Dementia and Alzheimers. Games train your brain to expand memory capacity. Strategy games also make grades improve in school, which involves problem-solving skills. Gaming also sparks creativity in a way that doesn't correlate with the internet and technology or the game content.

But wait, there's more!

Extensive gaming has some benefits, which is creating complexities in your brain that allow you to multitask. You become more efficient. Extensive is not addictive - do not make that mistake. Action gamers make faster decisions, and gamers in general have long and short term decisions made faster. Gamers also have higher IQs, in general, because they game for the intellectual stimulation that school or work doesn't give them. Video games actually seek out intelligent people.

All this evidence is proof of improved brain activity. It is still important to remember that gamers are usually nerds and geeks, and these people are usually high in intelligence. We gamers want more stimulation in our entertainment. If someone is bored with an average activity that is a sign of intelligence (especially if they demonstrate that they can do it in less time than their classmates). This is why we need the challenge of a game. In some ways it seeks out the intelligent and improves their brain function simultaneously.

Game Content Matters

I play a variety of games - from Nintendogs to Legend of Zelda to Nancy Drew - and I'm sure other gamers do, too. Some days you want to play with bunnies and watch them do tricks. Other days you want to play an action game. Sometimes you feel like replaying your favorite mystery games. Does content matter? Let's talk about it.

The game categories include strategy, action, first person shooter, stimulation, sports, puzzle, and RPG (role playing games). All of them are different in nature. a Petz game is not the same as a James Bond shooter game when it comes to skills. The list below is the short version of what I researched. 

Strategy - involves flexibility, decision making, fast analysis, managing limited resources, logic

improves working memory and reasoning

Photo courtesy of Syfy Wire

shooter games - involves hand-eye coordination, fast thinking and decisions, quick reactions

improves spatial navigation, reasoning, memory, perception

downside- might be too violent for some people 

stimulation - mimics real world, includes decision making and managing resources

puzzle - involves patterns, logic, time pressured decisions

often played on tablets and phones out of boredom and while waiting for something

sports- fast paced, requires hand-eye coordination, fast analysis and decisions

action - problem solving, fast paced decisions, linear and nonlinear plotlines

improves problem solving, strategic thinking, teamwork, creativity

RPG - involves creativity, decision making, fast analysis and decisions, ability to think ahead

improves reasoning and logic, creativity

Closing Thoughts

Guess what? People make money off of gaming! Esports is the competitive gaming competition that makes it possible to game for a living. Also, doing game walkthroughs on youtube can make you some money, as well. Teams will work together to beat another team (which builds communication skills and empathy, as well as community support). They show these competitions live. Schools can actually do this, too, so this isn't just for adults. Basically, gaming is not for the bums in the basement - it can be beneficial to your brain. The video below will explain what you should consider in competitive gaming.

Sources:

https://www.healthygamer.gg/video-games-make-you-smarter-backed-up-by-research/#:~:text=A%20study%20conducted%20at%20the,Legends)%20and%20high%20intelligence%20levels.&text=The%20first%20group%20found%20that,strategy%20games%2

https://www.raisesmartkid.com/6-to-10-years-old/5-articles/57-what-video-games-are-good-for-the-brain

https://www.techlearning.com/how-to/what-is-esports-and-how-does-it-work-in-education#:~:text=Esports%2C%20or%20Electronic%20Sports%2C%20is,used%20for%20communication%20between%20gamers.