Tuesday, May 4, 2021

Teaching Introverts


Introverts know all too well that public education, camps, and even society as a whole are based on extroverts. We are tired of being told we need to be fixed. Half the world is introverted, so why are we being taught like extroverts? Teachers, you can help us learn better and be more comfortable in your classrooms and camps. Listen carefully and let me invite you into this discussion.


I understand that you have to teach both extroverts and introverts in the same classroom. I understand that you are responsible for all the kids at camp and that a bored child can become trouble rather quickly. I just want to make it clear that introverts are often overwhelmed with group activities for long periods of time, being called out publicly and put on the spot, and generally being forced into any spotlight. Yes, we learn to do extroverted things, but only because we were forced into it at a young age and we need to survive out in the world. We hate small talk, yet we learn to do it for work and other functions, all while being bored out of our minds and wanting to disappear into books. 

Having trouble identifying the introverts in the room? Look for small social groups. We also take a minute to think, yet we concentrate deeply. We observe more than speak. We avoid large crowds. Introverts are defined as introspective people who need social recharge time. We run our mental processes and thoughts through long-term memory, not short-term, so we need a pause to process and react. We open up and speak in smaller groups and private places. We are not built for long social periods of time. We are half the world. You know an introvert in your life - I guarantee it. We are called shy by those who don't understand that "shy" is not "introverted" and we don't need to be fixed. Shy is anxiety, but introverted is that we need process time. Introverts are often forced to socialize by today's standards of normality when we are running on empty socially, so be understanding when finding these people in your camp group or classroom. If they look socially exhausted leave them to themselves and they may perk up. 

Camps

Camps are full of fun activities and never dull. Constant activities are generally not fun for the introverted personality, who needs time to process and breathe. Yet, counselors have to herd the kids into activities all day because they are told kids left on their own get into trouble. In some cases, I know that to be true, but not all. Please let a socially exhausted child read a book in the cabin, or just sit with them. Unless you know someone is playing you, of course. Counselors are responsible for all the kids that live in their cabin. I know. I was one once. 

Most camps have a choice in activities and some of the time there is the freedom to chill. I'm not saying camps are awful. I enjoyed them. I just know that competitions are also not the most fun for us introverted kids. An over-competitive group will cause stress to a kid that isn't competitive in nature, especially if you are losing constantly and your group generally sucks at stuff. That sounds crude, but it is true of one camp experience I had. I also had the opposite experience, where a leader said 'do your best, have fun, but I don't care how we rank'. Ironically, the latter made us do better in rank than the former. As a counselor or leader, please don't pressure competition, even if you want the trophy. You may just get the trophy without the pressure-cooking, so relax. 

Leaderships should be mixed in extrovert and introvert ratio, ideally. Why? Because introverted kids need a role model on how to balance themselves in the world. An introverted leader can be related to, thus they can ask for advice and have support in hard moments. A leader that is attentive to both personalities (extroverted or introverted is not important here) will do well to lend support to both, unifying the kids under him or her. Friends are created in unified groups. This is the idea of camp groups. Done well, this concept is amazingly good at bonding kids. 

Depending on the ages and if your crowd is mixed, you may deal with flirting. Yes, this is important. pay attention to this subject. Notice who is cozy with whom and be aware of the drama that could form into a storm. Introverts and drama are a bad mix, which leads to the introvert becoming overwhelmed and hiding or retracting from the group dynamic. Yes, we may flirt, too, but if we do that is our own fault (speaking from experience), but still talk to that kid and help them learn how to fix it. Teach us young how to avoid drama, please. 

The Classroom

The public education system makes it hard to support an introvert because we are surrounded by people constantly and they try to fix us. We are looked upon with concern if we don't want to play a game or need space. It may be a good idea to create options for big projects that support all personalities. One of the biggest problems include group projects and speeches where we are put in the spotlight or have to deal with a lot of other humans. We like individual projects, in short, where we turn in our paper and don't stand in front of the class with everyone staring at us. 

Theatre is weird. This is one space where I can be someone else for a while and blow some peoples' minds by putting on a performance on stage with no fear. Yet, I can't do a speech without having a mental freeze-up. It's like my mental computer freezes and all my preparations were for nothing, yet if I have a script memorized I can do it almost perfectly. This is because we don't know the reaction of our audience in speeches, but when we go on a stage, everything is going to go how we expect and rehearsed. Predictability makes all the difference. The stage is predictable, but our outside conversations and speeches are just the opposite. Peer reflection that says we "look unprepared" because we mentally froze doesn't help us in any way. Please remember this and be understanding. 

Forced participation is a subject that you need to know about from the start of your lesson plans. Give us several options, please, because the more willing we are to do something the better the project will be. It is human nature that when you require someone to do something they don't want to they won't do anything past the bare minimum. They can even stop engaging, in some cases, so be kind and let us show you what we can do best, simply by giving students introverted and extroverted options to choose from. I also advocate throwing out the participation grade part of your lesson plan or giving us a form of participation that isn't verbal. 


Group projects are hard or easy depending on the size of groups you put us in and the people. Large groups make it hard to get a word in because we want to sound dignified. By the time we mentally rehearse (yes, rehearse) our thoughts the topic is gone or we get interrupted time and again. Small groups of four may be like this if someone takes over, but it is still better to have more openings to speak than fewer. The quality of people makes these worse or better. Either way, it is a million times easier to work alone for us, because we don't depend on the rest of the group for anything. If you do have groups, make them small.

In General

If you described us introverts as quiet, shy, sensitive, or any similar word you probably influenced the reactions toward us. You didn't think about it, I'm sure, but it happened all the same. Presenting us as sensitive makes people treat us carefully and the word quiet makes people approach us like a birdwatcher approaches a bird. I, personally, am hard to offend, so sensitive is not the best word to use for me (though it is true I'm sensitive emotionally to a degree). Kids will treat us differently if you describe us in this way. 

This goes for every student; acknowledge our strengths and what we bring to the table. Please don't do so by bragging about us, however (so uncomfortable!). In this way, a book nook or quiet area of the classroom might not be a bad idea. Truly, that would make indoor recess more fun. Introverts will thank you. Even better, add a quiet part of the day to the curriculum and lesson plans. We pick up on this and hit our recharge button. You get more interaction from us as an added benefit. Show an introvert how to thrive in their element. 


Our thoughts come through less verbal mediums, like journals and social media (yes, that can make you think we're extroverted). Support us and give us time to think before you automatically jump into a large-scale class discussion. Maybe we could journal our thoughts first, or you could give us other options for this project. There are lots of nonverbal ways to hear our thoughts, so let us speak to you. In this vein of thinking, focusing on the quality of the participation is far better. Do us favors - we get enough criticism for our temperament already. Do let us know when we are transitioning into another activity.

Handle issues quietly. Seriously, this means the world to us. Loudly proclaiming our failures or mistakes is humiliating and humiliating a child is probably the worst embarrassment you can hand us. I distinctly remember forgetting my one scrap of paper for the concert, and even though I memorized it they persisted to embarrass me by handing me a paper and insisting on it - which proclaimed my failure to a whole crowd of parents and my classmates. They didn't mean to do this. I know that. Don't do the same to a student in your classroom. One on one private meetings are great places to talk and fix things in quiet. 

Speaking of unnecessary help, let us learn by ourselves at times. Yes, we are students, but if we didn't ask for help and you constantly treat us "special" it can be humiliating (for both reasons of excelling and failure). Let us explore. If we are truly drowning in a subject aid us privately, ideally, or find us a tutor. Proclaiming failure is a bad idea and that student won't trust you, let alone tell you what they need in a classroom to thrive. They will drown further, instead. Trust is everything here. Another point to make here is that when we speak we are often interrupted; don't make us deal with this in an educational environment and prove to us you are further untrustworthy. 

No emotional security means we don't learn well. Should I not feel secure being myself somewhere, I withdraw and learn less. Add bullies and you get a classroom that is not acceptable to introverts trying to learn. Humiliation also takes away emotional security, which can be said as trust. We go into our own world instead. Pay attention to this. It could mean they are bored or it could be they withdrew into themselves. There is a difference, so be prepared to observe further if you see us withdraw.

 Sources:

https://www.weareteachers.com/support-introverts-in-the-classroom/

https://www.ef.com/wwen/blog/teacherzone/tips-teaching-introverts/

https://www.teachthought.com/pedagogy/teaching-introverts-is-different/

https://www.partnersforyouth.org/rubys-story-understanding-introversion-in-a-youth-camp-environment/


Pictures:

John Spencer

Introvert, Dear

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